he is about to leave his little kindy world

I am having mixed feelings that my little boy will be graduating from his little world in kindy soon, end of next year. He might not know what is farewell and that he might not be seeing most of his frens again, (perhaps not until they start to fight to secure a place in local uni or JPA scholarship, if he is ever going to be THAT smart).

I have no idea how mothers cope with the feelings that their little girls/boys are going into Std1 where safety is not guaranteed. There might be possibility that blur Khye will get into wrong vehicle. Or is he going to be conned into going home with strangers. Or what if Khye tries to be funny and tries to walk home from school. Well, i did that when i was in Primary 1, but that was long before kid kidnapping cases increase. What if he is bullied in school due to his size. What if someone extorts money from him. What if the teachers dun like him. What if he gets lost in the school. There are soooo many what-ifs.

Not forgetting should i send him to chinese / math / eng / BM enrichment classes now or later, should i send him to mental arithmetic class or problem solving class, should i send him to ABRSM or continue Yamaha. I have to finalise all these classes as soon as possible before i go crazy surfing for the information of the right courses for him. Being the eldest in the family, no doubt Khye is the guinea pig. By the time it reaches Ern, life will be smoother for all of us.

i'm back

HELLO!! The fact that i still remember the passwords to my blogs is amazing :P

Project No.3 aborted

Ok, officially aborted Project No. 3. I gave myself a target, if we dun get a baby by Oct-2011, my factory will be closed down officially. Time's up and it's CLOSED! :(

yes, bye bye

Two weeks ago, our home was hit by the biggest tornadoes. We were left with absolutely nothing but hatred hatred hatred hatred. And, it's finally over.....and i hope for good.

just bla-ing

While searching for someone to bla all my frustrations and unhappiness....i remembered my good old blog :)

He says i'm selfish.
Honestly, i really can't think of anything that i've done to make him label me in such away.
Was it due to i took leave to go shopping on my own? He can do it if he wants to.
Is it due to i play with iPod on the bed while waiting for the kids to fall asleep on their own, while he does his own things downstairs? Is there anything wrong with this sentence?
Is it due to i'm not willing to share my Twisties or Mister Potato with him? But, there are a lot more in the kitchen cabinet, all he needs to do it walk to the kitchen and grab them himself. I
s it due to i dun want to talk to him when i'm watching my movies?
Seriously, i did what i have to do at home. I cook, i clean, i wash, isn't that enough yet? I do my chores, you do yours. Am i still selfish?

He says i'm rude, therefore he "has" to be rude to me.
Rude is not the correct word. I'm a very (maybe over) practical and straightforward person. He knows that since long long ago. He told me his nose was painful and that it worsen his tootache. My direct reply was "haiyo, why you also have this kind of problem". Dun even expect me to say some sweet lovey-dovey words. Whenever khye tells me he falls down, my reply is also the same "haiyo why you all fall down", followed the 5W 1H questions. That's me.

He says he is a good man but nobody appreciates that.
I dun deny that the 1st part and it's better he dun say that aloud. Now, I have to elaborate on the 2nd portion. Nobody appreciates him. You mean, i have to shower you with praises, hugs and kisses each time you clean the porch? Like i always say, i do my chores, you do yours. We don't have to thank each other, it's our responsibilities. Sometimes, he's really a nuisance. He will say if i can't or not willing to do something, he can always complete it FOR ME. Yes, FOR ME. And the catch is, he will do it, but with endless self praises and reminders, not to mention grumbles and show me his temper for whole day.

He says he no longer has his "ME TIME" and he's happier in his bachelor days.
HELLO!! For goodness sake, please come back to reality and stop dreaming & STOP COMPARING. If i could turn back the clock, do you think i still want to stay with you? We're grown up adults and with a family now. You should think of future and how to plan for the future, not thinking about the past! Stop thinking about "if only this if only that". If you want "ME TIME", take time off from your work and have a day all to yourself. Pamper yourself, instead of sulking at home and telling people how miserable your life is. And if your "ME TIME" means we go on separate ways, please give me notice to get prepared. And MY kids will follow me whever i go, that's for sure. You can get someone else to bear you YOUR kids.

And i feel so much better now.

Khye's update

Me: Spread your arms Khye. Be like a butterfly (showing him how to spread my arms).
Khye: I want to be a small butterfly (keeping his elbow to both sides of his body)
Me: Why?
Khye: Cos my hands will pain.


Me: Spell MA-ma TA-ta.
Khye: MA-ma TA-ta, mata.
Me: What is mata in english?
Khye: Mata in english is policeman.


Me: Please finish your vitamins.
Khye: You also finished yours?

Papa, higher the tv volume, i cannot hear.
Papa, on the fan, i hot hot.
Papa, you beat mei mei, naughty girl.


But he could be very caring too sometimes:
Khye: Your hand/leg/body ok liao ma?

Khye is growing too fast

At the age of 2+, Khye was already telling me this:
- i want to sleep, i tired- raining, go home

- meimei, no, cannot put into mouth

- i dun want to give you flashcards/books/ABC blocks

- cannot finish milk, stomach pain, can vomit

- turn left turn right no entry

At the age of 3+, he...:

- pout his mouth when upset- argue and abuse me

- write A-Z, a-z, 0-9

- draw balls- circle with 2 curves

- dance & sing

- negotiate

- try to bluff me

Undo & Rewind

If there are Undo or Rewind buttons in life, i'd rewind my life to 1996 and start all over again wisely & happily.

a real mom

Becoming a mom has become one of the routine in my life since Khye was born. However, the feeling of becoming a REAL mom hits me lately.

Firstly, when i was confirmed pregnant with my second baby. Crazy me, but it's sad to think that khye is not going to get 100% attention from me anymore and i'm going to miss his growing up before my eyes. We are closer to each other more now that khye started to ignore and refuse his dad. He even wants me to clean his butt and wear the diaper on him. Every night, khye will glue to me until he goes to sleep.

Secondly, we have to look for a suitable nursery for khye before the arrival of the second one. One weekend, we went to survey a few nurseries and after looking at the number of kids in the nurseries, i started to worry about khye. He is going to be alone with so many kids. He is going to be force to do things in a more strictly manner. Are the teachers going to patient enough with him? Are the teachers going to hit him? Will the teachers hide the truth from me when khye slips and falls in the toilet? What if i find bruises on khye's body? What if khye doesn't want to sleep and the teachers will force the cough syrup down his throat? What if khye is being bullied by the bigger sized kids but the teachers will tell me it's a common? What if, what if, what if....these are the questions that run thru my mind the whole week after the survey. Suddenly, i'm missing khye.

Lastly...Khye has not been feeling well since last Monday. And i failed to detect that as a mom. He was fussy, cranky and a crying baby at night. Even while sleeping, he would want to hold my fingers to make sure i'm there. Until Weds night, he was down with fever, followed by throat inflammation then cough. On Saturday night, i was thinking, what food can he take on Sunday. Usually, sunday is a rest day for me, which means no activities in the kitchen. We would buy breakfast, lunch and dinner. Lately, i came to realise that i should cook on everyday sunday, to ensure khye eats well, esp when he dun take veggies at all during weekdays. Yesterday, i cooked kuey teow soup for lunch and spaghetti for dinner. Hubby had to finish the awful kuey teow soup from lunch. Amazingly, khye finished his lunch & dinner without protest....am so pleased. I can tell the whole world, khye likes my cooking in the end!!!

2 red lines

When my mensus delayed for the 6th day, i was so excited that i bought home the test kit. I had a very strong feeling that i'm preg but i still need to be 100% confirm. So, on the 7th day, i woke up so early in the morning around 5.30am and also cos i couldn't sleep anymore. I collected the first urine of the day and dipped the stick into the urine. It didn't take long for the 2nd red line to appear and i could feel my face glowing already. I left the stick in the toilet, took a pic and went back to bed. Hubby was away on biz trip and i kept it until he was back, which was a week later. I was so good in keeping secret :D Silly hubby had the stupidest reaction ever. He asked me, why i showed him the picture of the test kit from last year.